Gravestones and Memorials: Rules, Costs, and Approval Process

A memorial stone is often one of the most enduring tributes to a person's life, and getting it right matters. But the rules governing what is permitted — and the process for obtaining approval — vary considerably depending on where the burial took place. This guide covers everything you need to know before commissioning a memorial.

Churchyard vs Cemetery: Two Different Sets of Rules

The most important distinction when arranging a gravestone is whether the burial is in a churchyard or a cemetery — as the rules that apply are quite different.

Churchyards are burial grounds attached to a church, most of which belong to the Church of England. They are governed by ecclesiastical law, and the rules for memorials are set by the Diocese through what are called "faculty jurisdiction" regulations. Each Diocese publishes its own guidelines, but common requirements include:

• Maximum dimensions for headstones (commonly 900mm high, 600mm wide, and 150mm thick, though this varies by Diocese)
• Approved materials — generally natural stone such as granite, limestone, or marble; many Dioceses do not permit polished black granite, which is allowed in most cemeteries
• Simple, reverent inscriptions — some Dioceses restrict unusual wording, photographic engravings, or non-traditional imagery
• No kerb sets (surround borders) in many churchyards, as they make mowing and maintenance difficult

Municipal cemeteries (run by local councils) and private cemeteries (run by private companies or charities) each have their own memorial regulations, published in their conditions of interment. These are generally more flexible than churchyard rules and may permit:

• A wider range of materials, including polished granite
• Larger monuments (kerb sets, flat plaques, obelisks, and ledger stones) subject to size limits
• More personalised wording and imagery, including photographs etched onto the stone

The Approval Process

Regardless of whether the burial is in a churchyard or cemetery, most require a formal application before a memorial can be installed. The process typically works as follows:

1. Choose a licensed memorial mason: most churchyards and cemeteries require that the memorial is supplied and installed by an approved or registered mason. The National Association of Memorial Masons (NAMM) or the British Register of Accredited Memorial Masons (BRAMM) can help find qualified tradespeople.
2. Submit a design application: the mason will usually prepare a scale drawing of the proposed memorial showing its dimensions, material, and the planned inscription. This is submitted to the churchyard or cemetery for approval.
3. Churchyard faculty application: in a churchyard, approval is granted by the Diocesan Chancellor as part of the faculty jurisdiction process. For standard memorials that comply with the Diocese's general approval (known as the List B matters under the Faculty Jurisdiction Rules 2015), approval is often granted by the parish priest without needing a full faculty.
4. Await confirmation: approval typically takes 2–6 weeks. Do not proceed to installation without written confirmation.
5. Installation: the mason installs the memorial in compliance with the approved design and any requirements for fixing and foundations.

Typical Costs for Headstones and Memorials

The cost of a headstone or memorial depends on the size, material, complexity of the inscription, and any additional engraving or decoration. Typical price ranges in 2025–26:

• Basic upright headstone (granite, standard size, simple inscription): £800–£1,500
• Mid-range headstone (polished granite or good quality limestone, more detailed inscription): £1,500–£2,500
• Premium or bespoke headstone (high quality granite or natural stone, complex design, photograph engraving, kerb set): £2,500–£5,000 and above
• Flat memorial plaques (for lawn sections of cemeteries, often standardised): £500–£1,200
• Cremation memorials (smaller stones for memorial gardens at crematoria): £400–£1,000 depending on the crematorium's requirements

In addition to the cost of the stone itself, cemeteries usually charge a separate fee for permission to erect a memorial (a "memorial permit" or similar), which can range from £50 to £200. Check the cemetery's schedule of charges.

The Waiting Period Before Installation

One of the most common surprises for bereaved families is the waiting period before a permanent headstone can be installed after a new burial. Most churchyards and cemeteries require a wait of 6–12 months (sometimes longer) after burial.

The reason is practical: freshly disturbed soil takes time to settle. If a heavy stone monument is installed too soon, the ground beneath it may subside unevenly, causing the stone to lean or become unsafe. An unstable headstone is a serious safety risk.

During the waiting period, families often place a small temporary marker (usually provided by the funeral director) or simple wooden cross at the grave. This is standard practice and is not considered disrespectful.

The risks of installing a headstone too early include:

• The stone tilting or sinking as the ground settles, requiring expensive corrective work
• The memorial becoming unstable and posing a danger to visitors — the cemetery or churchyard may require it to be removed at your expense
• The application being rejected because the required waiting period has not elapsed